Hooking up was the focus of a recent dinner time conversation with our big kids. We were hearing about the party scene, people, parents, alcohol, rules and behaviour. So what exactly is ‘hooking up’? And how might you be hooked into a culture even when you are not participating directly?
According to Adelaide Mena and Caitlin Seery La Ruffa many college students don’t even know what this ‘hooking up’ means. And there is danger, anxiety and alarm surrounding the burgeoning culture to “hook up” with anyone in an alcohol fuelled environment.
The teenagers at dinner could talk about behaviours, attitudes and individuals who embraced this “hooking up” culture. The underage party, permission notes, drinking, supervision and reputations were all up for discussion. So what plays out at a tertiary level?
When somewhat drunkenly bringing someone back to your dorm is the norm, how are bystanders (in a dark, noisy, crowded space) supposed to distinguish good intentions from bad? How can an onlooker see the difference between a young man genuinely seeking to help his friend get back to her room safely and one pretending to be a good friend, only to take advantage of her once there? One of us had the horrible experience—twice—of being witness to a friend’s assault in the very next room and being powerless to do anything, not because of physical inability, but because by all external appearances what was happening looked just like any other weekend night.
The Gospel Coalition offers this piece with links to follow up. In a culture where boys will be boys and girls go wild, we must all be part of the conversation.